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The Way the Brain Functions

Welcome to Module #3 of the coaching program on Emotional Smarts. 

In the last module you explored the definition of emotional intelligence and learned three healthy ways to deal with emotions.

 In order to become emotionally intelligent, it is important to understand how the brain works, so you can see the role that emotions play in your thinking and actions. 

In this module your exploration will continue as you discover the link between thinking and emotions in how the brain operates.

 

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Worksheet #3 -  

 

 

‘The Way the Brain Functions’

 

Your brain is constructed with emotional and intellectual components located in two separate places. 

The emotional mind is located in the Limbic System, which is in the center of the brain. Within the Limbic system is the 

  • amygdala (uh-mig-duh-luh) which is always on the alert for danger 
  • hypo campus which stores memory and doesn't come into play until 2 1/2 to 3 years.    

The rational mind is located in the cerebral cortex that surrounds the outer portion of the brain.

When you receive normal stimuli through your senses, it passes through the portion of the brain called the thalamus that lies between the amygdala and the cerebral cortex.  The thalamus’s many functions include

  • relaying sensation,
  • spatial sense, 
  • motor signals to the cerebral cortex.  
  • regulates consciousness,
  • sleep, 
  • alertness.

 

Your experiences usually pass through a top-down path with the rational part of the mind first, before generating an emotional response. In other words, your experiences pass through the rational part of the mind first, before generating an emotional response.  This delay helps to keep your emotions in check most of the time. 

 

At other times it's a bottom-up process.  In highly emotional moments, the amygdala plays a crucial role in how a person reacts. 

 

While the amygdala and cerebral cortex usually work in tandem, when emotions run high – or get really charged up - your emotions can overtake your rational thinking. 

 

If a threat is perceived, the amygdala will "hijack" or bypass the reasoned response process. It will then flood the brain with electro-chemicals that generate a "fight-or-flight-or-freeze" type response.   Such a response can save your life in certain situations, or get you into trouble when you overreact in other situations.    

 

In other words, your "hot buttons" get pushed, leading to a strong emotional reaction, such as defensiveness, rage, physical outbursts, ill feelings, etc. 

 

Your brain is made up of many neurons that form neural networks or strings of nerve cells sometimes called circuits, that fire at the same time.

 

What we have experienced gets stored in these networks. These networks are like electrical wires in your brain.

 

During the first 3 years of life, many of these foundational networks are established. This is prior to the formation of conscious memory, as the hypo campus has not yet developed.

 

But you do have feeling memories that are stored in your body and become what are bottom-up memories and reactions later in life when anything 'feels familiar'. They can determine how you respond in the present. It's how you are wired.

 

You could say "It's not me it's my wiring." but you are still responsible for identifying your feelings and reactions and doing the work to rewire what is needed.

 

When any experience is repeated, especially with any emotional charge, these wires get stronger.

The wiring can be considered ineffective if they lead to stress states.

The good news is that you can rewire your brain. It is up to you.

 

If we experience positive results and feelings they can be considered effective wiring.

By understanding the key areas of your brain and how they work, you can become more intelligent when dealing with your emotions and the emotions of others. 

 

Your highly charged reactions are often felt by those around you.  This is what scientists refer to as the mirror neuron system. This means that your thinking and emotions affect others, as you are impacted by them.  

 

Whether we like it or not, your thinking and emotional reactions impact your relationships.  Emotionally intelligent people understand the need to monitor this open-loop system. They are aware of their thoughts, feelings, and actions as well as those of others.

To strengthen your emotional intelligence, it is important to live more in the present moment and recognize how emotions are always at play. You will explore this next in Module #4.

 

 


Questions about the Brain

  1. What did you learn about emotions and the brain that you didn't know before? _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
  2. Which is your primary defense when feeling threatened? Fight, Flight or Freeze?_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
  3. Is your relationship being negatively effected by our emotional behavior? Fighting or Fleeing or Freezing?_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
  4. How are your partner's emotion impacting you?

 

The Present Moment