- Is unhappiness a valid reason or just an indication that there is work to be done?
- Is emotional or physical abuse a reason?
- Is adultery a reason?
- Is your partner's refusal to be influenced, take responsibility and change their behavior when appropriate, a reason?
Some benefits of commitment in relationship: (Steele, 2015)
2. Intimacy - Emotional closeness, love, trust, mutual support, builds and improves over time and is much more difficult to achieve as a single or in non-committed relationships.
3. Safe & good sex - committed monogamous partners have more and better sex than singles and non-committed partners.
4. Family - Children and adults thrive in stable, long-term, multi-generational relationships.
5. Economics - Committed couples are financially more successful than singles and non-committed partners.
6. Community - Extended family, neighbors, churches and other forms thrive in the stability of committed relationships.
7. Mental/Emotional/Physical Health - Married adults live longer and have fewer mental/emotional problems.
Some questions to assess your level of commitment to your partner:
2. Do you honor that commitment every day by communicating with each other the things you appreciate about each other?
3. Do your express physical affection on a daily basis with each other?
4. Do you communicate each day with each other what is going on in your life? e.g. what you are doing at work, what friends you have seen, what you are thinking and feeling etc.
5. Do you each take responsibility for your thoughts, feelings and behavior without blaming the other?
6. Do you regulate your emotions and adjust your mood when necessary without expecting your partner to change?
7. Do you accept each other's idiosyncrasies and tolerate your differences?
8. Are you committed to working through any and all problems/challenges you come across in your marriage?
9. Are you committed to providing a safe and secure environment, and to never abandon or threaten to abandon your partner (even when disagreeing on something)?
10. Are you committed to never talking to a person from the opposite sex about deeper thoughts and feelings than you do with your partner?
11. How much do you make each other a priority in your day to day life?
12. Do you believe unhappiness is an indication there is work to be done not a reason to break a commitment?
13. Can you say 'I love you and I will never leave you' to your partner and mean it?